To Burn or Not to Burn?
For those of you who haven't heard:
I'm going to Burning Man for the first time this year.
Technically, I've been to AfrikaBurn in South Africa back in 2015 (see baby Dayna in the picture for this post!). But that was a different story—I landed off a plane, showed up with a few belongings, and my South African friends handled the rest.
This time? Completely different.
This time, I'm going alone.
I'm the one figuring everything out—ow to get there, what camp to join, what to bring, and generally…how the heck to survive in the desert for a week.
In all honesty, it's a ridiculous situation to throw myself into with only a few weeks to prep and a family reunion on the east coast the week before the burn.
And yet…something in me knew this was the year to go.
I've considered it in the past…but for the first time, I'm the master of my own schedule.
I could give my clients advance notice.
I could make the space.
And most of all—it felt aligned with my mission this year: to live from my essence, share that essence with the world, and open myself to new experiences, environments, and communities.
For all those reasons, I was a HELL YES!
Or so I thought…until the spreadsheets, checklists, and logistics hit—and I was overwhelmed by the sheer enormity of it.
Immediately, my brain fired off a thousand logical reasons to wait until next year:
You don't have enough time to prep
You should go with friends instead of going alone (DUH!)
You should really focus on your business (remember that thing you just launched this year?!)
So I did what seemed reasonable.
I messaged the half-dozen people I'd been talking to about going and updated them:
JK! See you next year!
I wasn't going. I was out.
…Except I wasn't.
Something in my body didn't feel right about my “no.”
There was a tug, a sense of unrest.
Like something I wanted just got pulled out from under me, and I didn't like it at all.
And here's what I realized:
I had to let myself be a FULL YES and a FULL NO to truly know where I stood.
I had to feel both sides in my body.
When I said my initial yes, I felt lit up, inspired, expanded, alive.
When I said no, I felt a temporary sense of relief—but soon after, I felt small and majorly bummed out.
I realized that my no was coming from fear. From overwhelm.
It wasn't a true no. It was a protective no—trying to keep me safe.
Which, while I appreciate... is not what I came here for.
I came here to live. To grow. To expand.
To step into the biggest, boldest version of myself.
So I ran it back.
And I said yes. A full F*CK YES.
So I'm doing the damn thing.
SO HERE'S YOUR TAKEAWAY
Sometimes, the only way to know what's true is to give yourself permission to fully feel your yes. And to fully feel your no.
Not just trying to think your way through in your head—but to really feel it in your body.
Try each one on.
Move with them.
Speak them out loud.
Feel them in your belly, in your heart, in your bones.
Let your body weigh in before your brain takes over.
You'll know what's true.
You'll land your Yes or No.
